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Funny Business in the Desert LbNA #68214

Owner:Martini Man
Plant date:Feb 25, 2015
Location:
City:Oro Valley
County:Pima
State:Arizona
Boxes:5
Found by: JoySong (2)
Last found:Feb 21, 2023
Status:FFFFFFFFFFFFOFF
Last edited:Jan 20, 2021
Last checked/found: 8 -OCT-2018

Location: daehliart atsiv adnil

Distance: ~2.5 miles

Time: ~ 2 hours and about 440 ft. elevation gain.

Terrain: Rocky dirt trail

Exclusions: No canine friends here (sorry, someone else's movie set)

Produced by: Martini Man and Wisconsin Hiker

I want to make a movie. But not just ANY movie. I want it to be a blockbuster, the best ANYONE has EVER seen! And it’s going to be a comedy, not one of those gross out movies or something that makes people cry. There’s enough of that in real life. But in order to do that, I need the best cast in the world, people known throughout time as some of the best funny people out there. Am I up to handling those kind of personalities? Who knows, but a man’s gotta live! And YOU can help me!

You see, I know where these folks hang out. So come with me on a search for the best kind of comedy talent we can find and, together, they, you and I will make an epic called “FUNNY BUSINESS IN THE DESERT”!

So here we go thru the gate. To find our first great funny person we take a right at the sign board. As we continue on you will note a fence and a school on the right. No worries, these guys kept it clean. Richard Pryor is not on the A list (plus most every comic out there these days). We eventually come to a crossroads shaped like an isosceles. Let’s go straight (south) here. We eventually come to a fork in our path with a line of rocks, staying on the left (you can see a white building ahead from this point). Stop at a Palo Verde sheltering four saguaros on your left. Look south to see two more palo verdes. Go 24 steps in between the palo verde trees. Our first cast member can be recruited from the east side of the eastern palo verde teamed up with a saguaro. Who is this guy? Well, here’s a famous quote of his.

“I had a dream that I was awake and I woke up to find myself asleep.”

So back to the main path we were on. I hope he said yes. He did? Wonderful! We have a great start. Let’s head east. It’s a long and slow ascent up these switchbacks, but to find this next guy we have to keep heading up. Wait! You see that room-size field of rock piles on the right with a lone double saguaro with three small arms located at the top of the pile? And there’s the skeleton of its kinsman standing behind it. Palo verde trees guard either side of the rock pile. Go over to that double saguaro, take 8 steps at 200 degrees and see who’s under the large rock at the SE corner. You find someone? Did he agree too? Great! He’s a funny guy too and knows our first cast member well.

“That's another fine mess you've gotten me into.”

OK, we have two of our cast. Let’s get back on the main trail. At the intersection, take a right. We shall cross a wash and approach a sign. Pass it on the right and continue straight ahead. We then pass over a rock between several large boulders. Descend thru a wash then up to a boulder wall. Continue 5 steps to a pointed rock in the middle of the trail. Look sixty degrees and walk in 13 steps to a split rock. Our next comic genius lives behind the larger half under some smaller rocks. Is he in? Fantastic! What’s he have to say?

“I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it.”

There’s words to live by, but in the desert? Let’s continue on the main path. We shall wind our way down and up until we finally reach an open spot on the left, guarded by an ancient saguaro with 9 arms. He must be an arts critic because some of his thumbs point up and some point down. From the critic’s clearing take 25 more steps down the main trail to a small side trail on the left. Beyond we should see a large palo verde at 250 degrees and an ocotillo barely in view at 230 degrees. Yeah, this guy’s reclusive. We’ll have to find a route to that ocotillo. Jusr south of the ocotillo and adjacent to another palo verde is our next cast member, residing on the east side of a rock with a cleft. Also you might see a cactus lying dead on the ground to the west as reference point. I presume it died laughing as this guy’s a stitch. Did he agree? WOW! I must have quite the reputation as we both know I can’t pay what they normally ask for! What did he say?

“I suppose that's one of the ironies of life, doing the wrong thing at the right moment.”

OK, he’s going to have one of the more serious roles. Let’s return to the main trail one last time and continue on. We only need one more comic and the cast is complete. Eventually we should pass a fence and a building on our right. Nope, this person does not live there. We will continue QUITE a ways past a number of rooftops with solar panels until we see a third bank of solar panels on another building to the right and an armless saguaro (which now is not so armless as we now see two little nubbies growing out) on a rocky hill to the left. You will know you are at the right spot as there will be a yellow abode located to the right of the building with the solar panel array. At the white rock very near the left side of the trail, please take a bearing of 215 degrees and go 15 steps to the (sort of) armless saguaro (must have been an unsuccessful critic). Then take 6 steps on a bearing of 250° to an angled rock. Is our man at home in the rock cave formed by an angled rock just SE of a smaller saguaro? And? OH GOOD! We are done!

“A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones that need the advice.”

Now we can return to the trail and continue on to complete the loop we were traveling and get on with the movie!

We don’t live near here, so I’d appreciate an email to let me know how you did in rounding up the cast.