"Little Jack Horner's Grave" LbNA #15602
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Add Location| Owner: | Adoptable |
|---|---|
| Plant date: | Jun 5, 2005 |
| Location: | |
| City: | Phillipsburg |
| County: | Phillips |
| State: | Kansas |
| Boxes: | 1 |
| Planted by: | Rad Rhymer  |
|---|---|
| Found by: | Little Chief |
| Last found: | Aug 7, 2005 |
| Status: | F |
| Last edited: | Jun 5, 2005 |
NEWS FLASH!
Little Jack Horner's gravesite has been attacked by grave robbers! Not only have they stolen his body and his coffin, they also wiped out the entire cement vault! Little do the villians realize, a curse has been placed upon them by the ghost of Jack Horner. Alas! The next plum they sink their teeth into, will immediately turn into a jalapeno pepper!
According to rumors, the relatives of Mr. Horner plan to relocate his gravesite sometime in the near future, provided they ever manage to find his body.
(Previous Clues, no longer valid)
I suppose you’ve all heard the nursery rhyme about Little Jack Horner, but do you know the real story behind it? If you recall, the rhyme goes, “Little Jack Horner, sat in the corner, eating his Christmas pie. He stuck in his thumb and pulled out a plum and said, “What the heck is a plum doing in my cherry pie?” Actually, that’s not quite right. What he really said was, “What a good boy am I!” I’m so sure!!! I hardly think that sticking ones thumb in a pie would exactly qualify you for the “Good Boy Award,” now, would it? Anyhow, I guess his Mom didn’t think so either, ‘cause she grounded him on the spot! Made him go to bed, immediately!
“Aw, gee, Mom!” he moaned. “Can’t I at least watch TV?”
“Absolutely not!” she answered. “Besides, TV hasn’t been invented yet.” (Keep in mind, this nursery rhyme was written back in 1725)
Well, Jack tried his darndest to get out of going to bed. It was, “ Ma, I want a drink! Ma, I gotta go to the bathroom!” (Actually, I think the kid said “outhouse.” After all they didn’t have bathrooms in those days.) Anyhow, there’s one thing that hasn’t changed much, and that’s kids.
Well, finally Jack grew desperate! He was getting really tired of throwing spitballs at the wall, so he decided to crawl out the window and take off. (Come to think of it, had windows been invented yet in 1725??) He walked north until he reached a pile of rocks. Then he walked north some more until he reached a bigger pile of rocks. (Well, what do you expect? This was 1725, and there wasn’t a whole lot of tourist attractions in those days.) Then, he turned west and walked just a short way, but I guess he wasn’t looking where he was going, because he walked off into a rectangular hole in the ground. That’s one thing I know they had in 1725….holes in the ground. Anyhow, it was dark down there and the only thing in there, besides Jack, that is, was a bunch of spiders, three lizards, and a mouse on a chair. Well, Jack was tired, so he sat down on it. The chair, that is….not the mouse. He started to cry and then he blew his nose on his coat sleeve, because Kleenex hadn’t been invented yet, either.
In the meantime, Jack’s parents were worried sick! They jumped into their Ford Explorer……excuse me, I mean, their horse and wagon, and took off doing 80…..make that 10 miles an hour! It took them three days to track Jack down, but they finally fished him out of that hole and took him home where he belonged. You talk about grounded! They even took his spitballs away from him!
Well, it’s a funny thing. Jack lived to a ripe old age, but he finally croaked and guess where he requested to be buried!! In that same rectangular hole he fell into as a kid! Don’t ask me why! Maybe he landed on his head when he fell in. Anyhow, when he kicked the bucket, his wife planted him in that lousy hole, and there he is to this day! The chair’s still in there too. So’s the lizards and the spiders and the mouse.
Now, just in case you’d like to visit Little Jack Horner’s grave, I’ll tell you where to go. Oh, sorry! Maybe I’d better re-word that….I’ll tell you where to find him. First, you find that first pile of rocks. Those rocks turned out to be a little town called Glade, there in western Kansas. Then you go straight north down Highway 183, about five miles, until you reach that bigger pile of rocks. That’s Phillipsburg. I think they built that town in about 1872. Well, then you turn west onto 36 Highway. You go past the Phillips 66 station and keep going until you get to the Branding Iron 2. That’s a restaurant, in case you didn’t know. Well, a few feet west of the restaurant you’ll see two BIG trees, side by side, and if you look to the north, right beside those trees, you’ll see the grave of Little Jack Horner! Somebody put cement blocks all around it, and then they plopped a cement top on it. Maybe they thought ol’ Jack would get out and run off again, who knows?
Well, you just might be wondering how the heck you’re going to look into that cement vault to view Jack’s body. Good question. I suggest you go around to the west side. See the hole where one cement block fell out? See the board just on the inside of the hole to the north? See the nail in the board? Well, below that nail, Little Jack Horner is in the corner somewhere in the dark depths of that grave. He isn’t eating pie, but he does have a plum on his thumb! I guess it got stuck. Anyhow, Jack’s floating around in there. Yep! Not just the spirit of Little Jack Horner, but his whole freakin’ body, plus his coffin, is floating around in that dark hole! Scary, ain’t it? If you can manage to grab his coffin, open it up, if you dare, and you’ll be able to see Jack’s bones! Not a pretty sight! I’m warning you, put him back where you found him, or that son-of-a-gun will haunt you the rest of your miserable days!
Now, for Pete's sake, don't go down inside that hole! I hear it stinks down there. Probably Jack's decayed body. Or maybe the mouse up and croaked.
By the way, you might want to throw a flower or two in the grave, out of respect. Or, if nothing else, just toss in a couple of plums, or maybe a hunk of cheese, in case the mouse ain't dead yet.
P.S. Just in case a cop happens to come by and asks you what you’re doing, explain to him that Little Jack Horner’s dead body is floating around in that hole, and you’re trying to grab hold of him to open his casket and view his corpse. That cop won’t bother you again. In fact, he ain’t gonna touch you with a ten foot pole!
Little Jack Horner's gravesite has been attacked by grave robbers! Not only have they stolen his body and his coffin, they also wiped out the entire cement vault! Little do the villians realize, a curse has been placed upon them by the ghost of Jack Horner. Alas! The next plum they sink their teeth into, will immediately turn into a jalapeno pepper!
According to rumors, the relatives of Mr. Horner plan to relocate his gravesite sometime in the near future, provided they ever manage to find his body.
(Previous Clues, no longer valid)
I suppose you’ve all heard the nursery rhyme about Little Jack Horner, but do you know the real story behind it? If you recall, the rhyme goes, “Little Jack Horner, sat in the corner, eating his Christmas pie. He stuck in his thumb and pulled out a plum and said, “What the heck is a plum doing in my cherry pie?” Actually, that’s not quite right. What he really said was, “What a good boy am I!” I’m so sure!!! I hardly think that sticking ones thumb in a pie would exactly qualify you for the “Good Boy Award,” now, would it? Anyhow, I guess his Mom didn’t think so either, ‘cause she grounded him on the spot! Made him go to bed, immediately!
“Aw, gee, Mom!” he moaned. “Can’t I at least watch TV?”
“Absolutely not!” she answered. “Besides, TV hasn’t been invented yet.” (Keep in mind, this nursery rhyme was written back in 1725)
Well, Jack tried his darndest to get out of going to bed. It was, “ Ma, I want a drink! Ma, I gotta go to the bathroom!” (Actually, I think the kid said “outhouse.” After all they didn’t have bathrooms in those days.) Anyhow, there’s one thing that hasn’t changed much, and that’s kids.
Well, finally Jack grew desperate! He was getting really tired of throwing spitballs at the wall, so he decided to crawl out the window and take off. (Come to think of it, had windows been invented yet in 1725??) He walked north until he reached a pile of rocks. Then he walked north some more until he reached a bigger pile of rocks. (Well, what do you expect? This was 1725, and there wasn’t a whole lot of tourist attractions in those days.) Then, he turned west and walked just a short way, but I guess he wasn’t looking where he was going, because he walked off into a rectangular hole in the ground. That’s one thing I know they had in 1725….holes in the ground. Anyhow, it was dark down there and the only thing in there, besides Jack, that is, was a bunch of spiders, three lizards, and a mouse on a chair. Well, Jack was tired, so he sat down on it. The chair, that is….not the mouse. He started to cry and then he blew his nose on his coat sleeve, because Kleenex hadn’t been invented yet, either.
In the meantime, Jack’s parents were worried sick! They jumped into their Ford Explorer……excuse me, I mean, their horse and wagon, and took off doing 80…..make that 10 miles an hour! It took them three days to track Jack down, but they finally fished him out of that hole and took him home where he belonged. You talk about grounded! They even took his spitballs away from him!
Well, it’s a funny thing. Jack lived to a ripe old age, but he finally croaked and guess where he requested to be buried!! In that same rectangular hole he fell into as a kid! Don’t ask me why! Maybe he landed on his head when he fell in. Anyhow, when he kicked the bucket, his wife planted him in that lousy hole, and there he is to this day! The chair’s still in there too. So’s the lizards and the spiders and the mouse.
Now, just in case you’d like to visit Little Jack Horner’s grave, I’ll tell you where to go. Oh, sorry! Maybe I’d better re-word that….I’ll tell you where to find him. First, you find that first pile of rocks. Those rocks turned out to be a little town called Glade, there in western Kansas. Then you go straight north down Highway 183, about five miles, until you reach that bigger pile of rocks. That’s Phillipsburg. I think they built that town in about 1872. Well, then you turn west onto 36 Highway. You go past the Phillips 66 station and keep going until you get to the Branding Iron 2. That’s a restaurant, in case you didn’t know. Well, a few feet west of the restaurant you’ll see two BIG trees, side by side, and if you look to the north, right beside those trees, you’ll see the grave of Little Jack Horner! Somebody put cement blocks all around it, and then they plopped a cement top on it. Maybe they thought ol’ Jack would get out and run off again, who knows?
Well, you just might be wondering how the heck you’re going to look into that cement vault to view Jack’s body. Good question. I suggest you go around to the west side. See the hole where one cement block fell out? See the board just on the inside of the hole to the north? See the nail in the board? Well, below that nail, Little Jack Horner is in the corner somewhere in the dark depths of that grave. He isn’t eating pie, but he does have a plum on his thumb! I guess it got stuck. Anyhow, Jack’s floating around in there. Yep! Not just the spirit of Little Jack Horner, but his whole freakin’ body, plus his coffin, is floating around in that dark hole! Scary, ain’t it? If you can manage to grab his coffin, open it up, if you dare, and you’ll be able to see Jack’s bones! Not a pretty sight! I’m warning you, put him back where you found him, or that son-of-a-gun will haunt you the rest of your miserable days!
Now, for Pete's sake, don't go down inside that hole! I hear it stinks down there. Probably Jack's decayed body. Or maybe the mouse up and croaked.
By the way, you might want to throw a flower or two in the grave, out of respect. Or, if nothing else, just toss in a couple of plums, or maybe a hunk of cheese, in case the mouse ain't dead yet.
P.S. Just in case a cop happens to come by and asks you what you’re doing, explain to him that Little Jack Horner’s dead body is floating around in that hole, and you’re trying to grab hold of him to open his casket and view his corpse. That cop won’t bother you again. In fact, he ain’t gonna touch you with a ten foot pole!